I love social media. It’s the opposite of talking on the phone, my least favorite method of communication, and it’s different from communicating in person. Talking on the phone or in person is often tiring–a lot of times there’s pressure to form an opinion right then and there–and it’s rude if you just stop carrying on a conversation and walk away. But talking on social media is entirely different. Not all introverts will feel the same way, but here are 5 reasons why I do a lot of my communicating via social media:
1. I can think before I voice my opinion. Social media is asynchronous, telephones are not. I *love* being able to think through a thought before I respond to a tweet or a Facebook comment, and I find it comforting that the other person is occupying their time however they see fit, not caring if I take ten minutes or an hour to think of a response. Synchronous communication on the other hand often makes me feel like I must have a response to a question then and there, even if I have no idea what I really feel about a subject.
2. I can have conversations with people who share my interests. For instance, I’m a Doctor Who fan. I’m watching all of the episodes, starting with the beginning of the show in 1963. Very few of my friends from high school, college, or work are also big fans. But online it’s so easy to find someone with the same interests as you. And it’s not unprecedented for people with similar interests who meet online to also meet in person. Just this weekend I had lunch with someone who also runs an introvert-focused website; we met on Twitter. Someone once said, in a tweet of course, that Twitter is filled with people you wish you went to high school with. Not that I dislike my high school friends of course, it’s just that I don’t have much in common with a lot of them.
3. It’s not interrupting something important. A lot of times I regard a phone call as an interruption. I’ll be in the zone – writing, or maybe thinking about a problem – and the ring of my cell phone will break my concentration. I have my email, Twitter, and Facebook notifications turned off by default so I only check them when I’m not in “the flow.”
4. Some people are very open online. If I meet someone for the very first time at a party we’ll probably talk about how we know a mutual friend, or what we do for a living. That first conversation generally isn’t very deep. But, sometimes the exact opposite happens online. You see someone posting about a divorce or death, and your first tweet to them might be something very personal. There are quite a few people on Facebook and Twitter who just bare their soul. Out there. For everyone to see. It’s refreshing, and interesting.
5. Not as tiring. Introversion and extroversion are about energy and stimulation. I find that listening to someone talk is far more tiring than, say, reading a tweet/Facebook post, thinking about it, and responding to it in my own time.
“On Twitter I can connect with someone, sometimes about personal or deep subjects, and not be totally drained by it.” (Tweet this)
Also, if I don’t want to continue a conversation on social media I just ignore that tweet or Facebook post. If I get overstimulated by seeing tweet after tweet after tweet I can just get up and get away from my laptop whereas in person it would obviously be really rude if I just walked away. Also, in person I sometimes find myself, as Marti Olsen Laney in The Introvert Advantage describes it, “vapor-locked” and have trouble forming sentences because I’m overwhelmed.
Some introverts don’t feel the same way and find social media itself to be overwhelming, but for a lot of us social media a nice place to be. And by using social media (and email) as my primary communication methods it means I have more energy to be social in person.
